Social Validity

It’s 7am, am standing at the 48 bus stop after a night of hard work & Sunrise sessions in club DQ, & it finely hits me… like a super charged epiphany why I always feel this deep neediness & disappointment when ever women don’t react to me the why I would like them to.

I feel as if I am OWED it as if I deserve it, as if the world revolves around me and my emotions. When in truth the world owes me NOTHING at all.

When I approach a girl, just because I am approaching doesn’t mean am OWED a good reaction from her, I don’t even KNOW her, she can choose to act how she wants, she owes me nothing, and I should want NOTHING. However I do owe MYSELF the self respect to WALK away from women who do not wish to be in my company and not let there reaction to my approach effect my emotions, I OWE that to MYSELF.

The philosophy of “The world owes me NOTHING, but I owe myself EVERYTHING” I feel applies to almost everything in love & life.

To expect the world to be fair and truthful towards me as if I were OWED it is ridicules and INSANE.

How can I feel bad when a woman doesn’t do something for me, when she owes me nothing in the 1st place & can do as she pleases, If I choose to buy her gifts, meals & presents as a way of trying to sex her & she “plays” me, how can I be angry with her & behave as if she OWED me the sex, as if the both of us had singed CONTRACTS & she had violated the terms and conditions.

Posted by Flows4ever at 04:52 | Permalink | Comments

OK iv been out a hell of a lot thses past 13 weeks (4/5 nights a week) and these are just a few random thoughts IV been having on certain subjects. (will post more as they come to mind).

Approach Anxiety

AA (approach anxiety) arises when our mind is away from the present moment and is instead focused on a mind imagined future, which tends to show a bad out come, a bad out come because the ego MUST BE RIGHT or it dies, the ego can not take risks it must be sure any action taken will strengthen it not weaken it so it projects an imagined future that works against us instead of with us to stop us from approaching.

Since the mind imagined future is not REALITY (the out come of our approach is still UNKNOWN) just thought. An anxiety GAP is created (AA) because we treat the mind imagined future as it if it where REALITY.

We get this feeling, of shrinking back from danger even tho there is very little danger of any thing happening that would be life threatening .

So best way to over come AA is to focus on what IS, the NOW, honour present moment since that is all that exists, there’s nothing out of it everything happens within the NOW (the present moment).

See girl you’re attracted to, asses situation and APPROACH, avoid thinking into mind imagined future and stay in the moment.

Spiking Emotions = Increase In Buying Temperature

Ok before I discovered what spiking emotions was I would go into a conversation with Neutral/platonic topics and questions, so there would be no buying temperature increase on the girls side.

Why? Because I wasn’t tapping into to her emotions, I was just trying to gain rapport. Now in DAY time this would work but in clubs/loud busy bars the conversation would go stale really fast, simply because I was asking and talking about what all the other guys before me where asking and talking about.

"whats your name"

"where you from"

"you come here often"

So recently IV been going out and throwing left field conversations, talking and asking about RANDOM shit that produces EMOTIONAL response’s, for example in the middle of a conversation I’ll sometimes go.

“You know before I came over to talk to you, I had this feeling that you’d be a real “bitch” but you’re actually ok”

They usually end up having this shocked look on there face then start qualifying them self’s. Anyway the whole point of me saying shit like that is to get an EMOTIONAL response out of her weather positive or negative it doesn’t matter as long as am tapping into her emotions.

Posted by Flows4ever at 04:46 | Permalink | Comments

Sometimes when playing the game with women you NEED to PLOW, PLOW, PLOW and FUCKING PLOW the shit till you cant PLOW no more and even after that PLOW some more because it’s always OOOON .

That’s what I learned the night I went out with a mate of mine called Kevin. This guy is a natural with women; he doesn’t care if there thin, big, small, tall if he can catch them chicks he’s FUCKING goner catch them. If he finds a girl that’s interested in him they aint NO FUCKING way on this plant he aint at least getting them digits, that kind of dumb shit just aint conceivable to him but it was TO MEEE until I went out with him on the 12/06/07.

That night I truly I leaned that it’s always OOOOOOON when your in the field it aint NEVER not on, the game is always been played and if you don’t stay focused on your goals and the end result your looking for, your goner miss the play.

Tuesday night was a very shit night, me and Kevin are heading home we see these to girls I gamed the night before but never bothered getting there numbers because deep down I BITCHED out of it.

We kiss close them and they leave to make there way to the club Kevin ask's if I got any of there numbers I say no, and he looks at me like am FUCKING mad. After that we literally CHASE down them chicks because in his mind they aint NOOOO way he aint at least getting them digits. If he finds a girl that’s interested in him they aint NO FUCKING way on this planet, no in this universe he aint getting at least a number.

I tried to spit some BULLSHIT that we’ll look desperate going back, he’s like “fuck you nigga” (where both black gangstar rude boys) am getting them digits “IT’S ALWAYS OOOOOOOON MOTHER FUCKER”. We chase them down and…….. he gets them digits. At the time my girl was throwing out some IOD’s (indicters of disinterest) but because I didn’t still have the mentality then in my head that “IT’S ALWAYS ON” i didnt carrie on playing the game so didn’t get my girls digits.

I learned that night that EVERYTHING you do in a sarge amounts to JACK FUCK SHIT if you don’t CLOSE, CLOSE, CLOSE AND FUCKING CLOSE SOME MORE you can run the tightest GAME in the world but if you don’t CLOSE it dont mean SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!! So what if it flakes you ran tight game and CLOSED you played your game how you knew best and GOT A SOLID END RESULT no “WHAT IF’S” you only end up knowing “WHAT IS”.

Posted by Flows4ever at 04:23 | Permalink | Comments

Open

Demonstrate Personality

Exchange Information

Screen/Qualify

Sexually Escalate (physically - Verbally)

Semi Isolate – Venue Change – Isolate - Close

Posted by Flows4ever at 06:22 | Permalink | Comments

NOTE: I only came to this realisation a few weeks ago so am still working on a better way of detailing exactly how it works.

“If a women is interested in you she will GIVE you what you need to sleep with her”

Those words have improved my interactions with women 5 fold these past few weeks. In the begging I didn’t really understand the importance of them because I never use to really LISTION to what the women I was talking to where saying to me I was more focused on keeping the interaction going and getting to the next stage of the PU (pick up).

After I started to sloooow my interactions the fuck down and stopped trying to stay one step ahead, I started to notice that women really do GIVE you what you need to sleep with them. If you can be bothered to pay attention to what there saying they’ll drop “HINT’S” indirectly in to the conversation that let you know what stage your at in the interaction and where to go from there. I only just started to KEY into some of the stuff they’ll ask or tell you that implies where there mind is at in that present moment.

When we go some where but are not completely sure of the route to take to get there we rely on sign posts to guide us, this same analogy works when interacting with women.

Anyway am not one of these guys who like to post looong as posts lol so I’ll just throw you guys a few examples and what “I BELIEVE” them to mean when women bring them up. This is from MY OWN experiences.

HB: what’s your name = [am interested and want to get to know you better]

HB: where do you “live” or where are you staying (sometimes they’ll ask you this Q: more then once and want details) = [am considering may be going home with you tonight/2day.]

HB: let’s go over her (away from the group) = [am semi isolating my self for you]

HB: shit tests you = [I want to see if your really who you portray yourself to be]

That’s just a FEW of the many signs posts that let you know where to take the interaction next and where you are at at that monument in the interaction.

Posted by Flows4ever at 06:21 | Permalink | Comments

Over the past few months I feel like iv really come far in my understanding of human to human interaction but there’s one thing that iv been wanting to touch on for a while and that’s Taking value/Giving value.

From going out into bars and clubs and socialising with people iv come to understand that these are the only 2 things really going on when a guy is interacting with women he finds attractive or a girl is interacting with a guy she finds attractive. Thorough the course of the interaction they will both be either Taking value or giving value to each other in SOME FORM.

It’s really hard for me to put this into words but it’s happening all the time, I mean for example on a night out you’ll see guys who are trying to grind girls on the dance floor or just blatantly hovering around them in a needy way with hungry eyes, you can latterly FEEL them wanting to TAKE VALUE from the girls in a, “haha LOOK at meeeee grinding this hot chick I am the shiiiiiiiiiiit haha” kind of way, instead of a
“LOOK at this girl TRYING to get in with me by grinding me”, the 2 are very different and noticeable.

Now from my experience iv come to the conclusion that girls trying to TAKE VALUE FROM ME works a lot more in my favour, that’s what negs/C-f are designed for, to make the girl want to attempt to take value from you by getting to know you.

Now don’t get me wrong Taking value/Giving value is not a bad thing if used probably in your favour.
You should always be the one offering value and not feel the need to forcibly TAKE others, like with AMOGing when you AMOG some one and they REACT it comes across as them trying to TAKE VALUE from you because they see you as someone worth reacting to, now if they where to say nothing you would be seen as the one trying to TAKE VALUE from them because your reacting to them.

When I approach am trying to approach in a why that says “am talking to you because “I” have SOOOOOO much VALUE am giving people the chance to take some of that for them self’s, so if your willing to put effort in to this interaction the only thing you’ll be doing is INCREASING your own value” and what person doesn’t want to increase there market value huh.

That’s all I got on this Taking value/Giving value thing so far will try and explain it in more detail when I gain a better understanding of it.

Posted by Flows4ever at 06:12 | Permalink | Comments

Note: Iv only just started playing around with this concept for a few days its still in its early stages but I want to know what you guys think.

3 Levels Of Attraction

(Below is a diagram of the levels of attraction)

↓
↓
Surface level attraction
↓
↓
Base level Attraction
↓
↓
Deep level Attraction

IV come to believe there’s 3 levels to attraction and depending on what level of attraction you get with a chick she will decide if she wants to see you again or sleep with you.

When I 1st started going out into the filed and getting numbers I would get LOADS of flakes and id just be like WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT lol because during the “initial” interaction the woman seemed to be having a blast, laughing with me and just generally having a good time.

What I didn’t realise was that at the time I had only generated a lot of SURFACE LEVEL ATTRACTION but no BASE LEVEL or DEEP LEVEL ATTRACTION was anchored into the interaction at the time, meaning when I left the surface level attraction I had created left with me.

Iv since gotten better at getting more base level and deep level attraction by reading the singes women give when they want to progress on to the next level of attraction (some girls only need LOADS of surface level attraction for you to fuck them eg: party woman).

Usually the sings I follow that she wants me to move on to the next level of attraction is by the amount of questions, kino, and positive body Lange she’s giving me.

When a women asks for my name (massive IOI) she’s telling me “flows101 please drop the gimmicks C/F, negs and hooks a bit and lets move onto basic base level attraction” or sometimes I’ll just fucking sense am creating FAR TO MUCH surface level attraction and just automatically drop all the gimmicks a bit and move onto the next level.

How to tell what level of attraction you’re on.

Surface level attraction:
From my experience so far when your in surface level attraction the girls are just having fun with you, there not taking you to seriously your just the next guy of the night helping them bump up there buying temperature.

Base level attraction:
From my experience you now you’re on base level attraction when she starts asking you general questions (eg: what’s your name, what do you do and how old are you) from my own experience if you where to take her number now she might not flake but would need further gaming over the phone before she would be willing to meet up with you or you could just go for the venue change.

Deep level attraction:
From my experience you know you’ve reached deep level attraction once you start talking about hopes, fears and dreams with a woman and you get the feeling you’ve known each other for months or years at this point you can usually go for the day 2 and KNOW its not goner flake or take her back to your place.

Note: Some guys just by there fucking aura, looks or social proof can go up to a women and get straight base level attraction in 0.01 second.

Posted by Flows4ever at 06:00 | Permalink | Comments